NaBloPoMo Month - "Simply Irresistible"
Entry #26 - 11/26/2013
I've decided to go with today's writing prompt that came in my email this morning as I have been super busy today...taking Cabot to his groomer's appointment and picking up the house in anticipation and preparation for "The Diva's" arrival tomorrow. For those of you who aren't aware...I often times refer to my grandmother Betty as "The Diva" she doesn't know why, but I think it's because she's pretty fabulously wonderful!
The prompt: Tell us about the favorite dish or food that you simply cannot turn down.
As I usually do with these prompts, I'm going to put my own unique spin on it, because for me it's never been about my favorite dish or food that I simply could not turn down...it was turning down any food.
I have a friend in Las Vegas who told me a few years ago that he had never been to a funeral. Never been to a funeral home and never had to experience death. That concept baffled me...literally I was confused on how someone who was at the time nearly 30 had never, not once in his life had to experience death and the loss of someone he loved. I write about this story, because for me death is where my addiction to food came from.
In April 1995, I was ten years old...just a few months shy of my 11th birthday when my great-grandmother Bertha died. She was Southern Baptist and what Southern Baptists in my community did was either send flowers or send food - in some instances they did both. I quickly sought refuge and comfort in a piece of chocolate cake...a slice of apple pie...a cookie here and there. My addiction to food only continue to grow worse as time would go by...in 1996 my step-grandfather died of lung cancer...in 1998 my father died...that was the hardest moment of my life...or so I thought...in 2005 my mother died. I lived in a world that had shown me that everyone leaves me and that the only true constant in my life was food and that was because I could control the very nature of it. I made the decision of when it came into my life...I made the decision of when I wanted to stop eating and I made the decision of what I wanted to eat.
For me it has never been turning down that one piece of chocolate cake because I indulged every great once in a while...up until earlier this year I was never going to turn down the one piece of chocolate cake...because I wanted that one piece and the whole damn cake too!
This year has been hard...because there have been times I have wanted to turn to food to give me comfort and peace of mind but I haven't been able to, because I want my willpower to be stronger than my need for the food. There have been times I've failed, but I have just picked myself up from the kitchen floor and progressed forward as best as I know how...and that's not very well.
Until Next Time...Ciao Bella!
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